Uh oh, willow's mad again
by geekylicious
Summary: Willow goes evil when her cellphone is dropped in the hellmouth. Warning: slash.
1. The cellphone

Disclaimer: We don't own these characters

**Chp1**

**It was a sunny day in Sunnydale. But Buffy Willow and Spike was at the Hellmouth, trying to figure out how to close it. **

"**I can say a magic spell! Agara digara jara sarara barra da! CLOSE" Willow shouted.**

"**It's not working!" Buffy screamed in anger.**

"**Bloody hell Buffy what is that button on the tree next to you?" Spike asked**

"**Which one? The red were it says close or the green were it says open?"**

"**I can ask the spirits! Abutchiboo RED button abuggala GREEN butt....."**

"**Stop it! of course it's the green one! we want to open it, right?" Said Spike confused.**

**Buffy peered over the Hellmouth and looked confused as she stared down.**

"**I thought that Giles said it was a bad hole so maybe we should close it?"**

**Willow started to open her bag. "Maybe we should ask..."**

"**Shut up!" Spike interrupted.**

"**... Giles" Willow finished.**

"**Smartass! He's not here, is he! Who's the dummy now?" Buffy said spitefully.**

**Willow took out her cell phone waved it infront of Buffy.**

"**Haha, that's you Buffy!" Spike replied.**

"**I am not!" Buffy shouted.**

"**Are too!" Spike said while dancing around her.**

"**I AM NOOOOOT!"**

"**Haha you so are"**

"**If you don't stop I'm gonna slap you to another zip code!"**

"**If I didn't have this crisp in my brain I would kick the shit out of you!"**

"**Its called a chip dumbass" Willow said.**

"**Ha! Look who's the dummy now!" Buffy said happily.**

"**I am so not" Spike said offended.**

"**Yes you are"**

"**No I'm not"**

"**Yes you are"**

"**No I'm not"**

"**Yes you are"**

"**No I'm not"**

"**Yes you are"**

"**No I'm not"**

"**SHUT UP!!" Willow screamed in anger while thinking she was the only adult. **

**While Willow started dialling Giles's number, Buffy and Spike started playing don't touch the ground, they then started to play Indians shouting and running around Willow.**

"**STOP IT" Willow screamed while she could hear Giles's answering machine go of:**

"**Hello you have reached Rupert Giles, I'm not in right now but please leave a message…**

"**I wanna talk to Giles" Spike said in a childish voice.**

"**No let me talk to him please please please please please please with whipped cream and a cherry on the top?" Buffy said **

"**NO, I'm gonna talk to him" Willow said with her last drop of patience. She then started to dialling a new number when Spike pulled it out of her hand.**

"**Give it back to me!"**

"**NO"**

"**I want it, give me it" Buffy said while jumping on Spike trying to take it from him. Spike and Buffy rolled awfully close to the gap of the Hellmouth. Buffy got the cell phone and tried to show off but she accidentally drop it in the Hellmouth. Willow saw what happened and starred at Spike and Buffy, she then started to breath heavily. Spike became very busy with whistling, but Buffy didn't now how to so she just made up noise. Willow's eyes became black along with her black hair. **

"**Uh oh" Spike said**

"**Willow is mad" Buffy said.**

**DUN DUN DUN… What's going to happen? **

**TO BE CONTINUED……**

**A/N ; hope you like it please review**


	2. The tall, dark and handsome stranger

Ch2

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

"RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN"

"Come back here you little…"

"Keep running, keep running," panted Spike while running for his life.

"You better pay my bill you a§0! 3s!"

"You pay it" Buffy said while stopping.

"No, you pay it" Spike said also stopping.

"You pay it"

"No, you pay it"

"You pay it"

"No, you pay it"

"STOOOOOOOOOOOOPP" Willow shouted in anger "are you dudes trying to make me more angry?"

Suddenly a mysterious fog appeared. You could see a silhouette of a tall, dark and handsome stranger. But it was not a stranger it was..…

"Honey I'm home!"

"I've missed you darling!" Spike said while running in to the arms of The tall, dark and handsome man.

"I've missed you to pumpkin," The tall, dark and handsome man said

"EEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWW get a room" Willow and Buffy said in chorus.

"Oh yeah I was mad my CELLPHONE" Willow remembered.

The tall dark and handsome man took out a new cellphone and a paid bill and said:

"Sign here, here and here." Willow started signing the paper.

"NOT there, here okay now your bills are paid and you have a new cellphone!" The tall,

dark and handsome man said. Willow's hair turned back into red and she was happy again.

"thank you…"

To be or not to be continued

AN it was a short chp but please RR


	3. The na na na na na na!

AN As you know last chp ended with "Thank you…" and now you will know who the tall, dark and handsome stranger is…

Chp3

"Thank you tall dark and handsome man" Willow said smiling.

"I do not want to be called as the tall dark handsome man, even if I am, I want to be called as-"

He took a heroic pose with a fist in the air as Superman and said

"Na na na na na na Angel!"

"You hunk no I mean punk" Buffy said while her cheeks turned red.

"You bitch! Don't call my pumpkin pie a hunk!" Spike yelled

"I'm not a bitch!" Buffy replied.

"You so are"

"No I'm not"

"Yes you are"  
"No I'm not"

"Yes you are"  
"No I'm not"

"Yes you are"  
"No I'm not"

"Yes you are"  
"No I'm not"

"Yes you are"  
"SHUT THE FK UP" Willow and the tall dark an- oops I mean na na na na na na Angel said in chorus.

Spike and Buffy stared at each other and Buffy said:

"You say sorry first Spikie"

"No, you say sorry first Buffo" Spike said.

"You Spikie say your sorry and mean it"

"No Buffo I don't have t……"

"Hurry up and say your sorry we have to get home to Oz he has pms." Angel said

"Is oz in town?" Willow asked

"Yes he is, we bumped in to each other on the train"

"Hold on Oz has pms!" Spike asked

"Yeah pre moon syndrome" Willow answered

"There is no thing as a pre moon syndrome" Buffy said spitefully.

"Yes there is" Spike said

"No there isn't" Buffy said

"Yes there is"

"No there isn't"

"Yes there is"

"No there isn't"

"Yes there is"

"No there isn't"

"Not again " Willow said

"Actually there is a thing called pms" Angel said

"Told you so, that's the way uhuh I like it uhuh" Spike said while dancing 70's style.

Buffy looked angry and sad while she starred down at the ground and said

"Let's go home!"

AN hope you like this chp it hasn't the same quality as the other chapters do cya.


	4. The pain, oh the pain in my brain!

**Chp 4**

**It was a not so sunny afternoon in Sunnydale. Buffy and co were walking home when Spike suddenly put his hands on his head and screamed in pain.**

"**Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa pain the pain in my brain. the pain causes my veins to flow. the pain causes me to faint." Spike put hand on his forehead and fell graciously to the ground.**

"**Spikie get up." Buffy said while kicking spike.**

"**I am unconscious" Spike said while opening one eye and then closing it again.**

"**It's probably your hair gel it looks like a pond on your head." Buffy said.**

**Spike quickly snapped out of his unconsciousness and said.**

"**it so does not"**

"**Yes, it does"**

"**No, it does not"**

"**Yes, it does"**

"**No, it does not" **

"**Yes, it does"**

"**No, it does not" **

"**God help us!" Willow mumbled **

"**I'm gonna smack you so hard your grandpa is gonna get a bump" Buffy screamed at Spike.**

"**Hey! No fair I can't hit you because of this crisp and my head really really really really really really really hurts! Oh the pain the pain in my brai-"**

"**SHUT UP" everyone screamed at Spike.**

"**STOP poke READING poke POETRY poke!" Buffy said while poking Spike in the chest.**

"**No bloody fair! Crisp crisp crisp crisp crisp crisp crisp crisp!" Spike said in pitchy voice.**

"**chip! for the last time it's a chip! Chip chip chip chip chip." Willow shouted.**

"**I don't know about you guys but I'm up for some fries." Angel said.**

"**Mmmm that sounds nice I'm always up for food" Buffy said**

"**My headache, my crisp, hello!" Spike said while pointing to his head.**

"**FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME, IT'S A CHIP YOU DUMBASS!" Willow screamed at Spike.**

"**Food, food, fries, fries come on!" Buffy said while jumping up and down**

**Angel took a heroic pose with a fist in the air and the other hand pointing at his car,**

"**Away to the Angel mobile!"**

"**first ching on the front seat!" Spike said while running to the car.**

"**No I wanna sit in the front seat!" Buffy said.**

"**I'm gonna sit in the front seat!"**

"**No I wan-"**

"**Ladies, ladies stop fighting! There's plenty of room in the-" **

**He took a sexy pose with bedroom eyes and said in a husky voice "Angel mobile"**

**Buffy and spike starred at each other for a minute and then Spike pushed Buffy.**

**Buffy then pushed Spike, then he pushed her and so on before Spike pushed Buffy so hard she fell not-so-graciously to the ground**

"**Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, the pain, the pain in my brai-, oh no now I'm like Spike, ouch that really hurt" **

**DUN DUN DUN DUN**

**How could Spike hurt Buffy with that crisp no I mean chip?**

**Will they get there fries?**

**Is Willow ever going to shut Spike and Buffy up?**

**Are they ever going to get those fries?**

**How is Oz? **

**Will they buy Oz fries? **

**If so, will he like them?**

**What about Giles, does he even eat fries?**

**If so, what will he think of them?**

**And what about Xander, is he going to get fries?**

**Who gets to sit in the front seat in the Angel mobile?**

**These and many questions will be answered in the next chapter of:**

**Uh oh, willow's mad again**

**TO BE OR NOT TO BE CONTINUED, THAT IS THE QUESTION**

**AN hope you like this chapter. Reviews are appreciated. I'm up for some fries. See you soon.**


	5. The an that's longer than the chapter it...

AN: We really really really really really really like the reviews! This story started out as a one-shot but the one-shot became history, history became legend and legend became myth.

And for 5000 years the story was kept secret until…

"HELGA! I'VE FOUND A PIECE OF PAPER AND IT HAS SOMEKIND OF WRITING ON IT!"

"INGA! I'M STANDING RIGHT HERE SO SHUT UP! THE BIKINICONTEST STARTS IN 5 MINUTES AND IT'S COLD HERE IN THE SNOW IN YOUR UNDERWEAR!"

"THE SNOWDOGS DIG UP A PIECE OF PAPER! I NEVER LEARNED HOW TO READ!"

(yank) "Ummm.. Uh… oh… umm.. Will-… uhhhhh… Willoooow… hehe.. Iiiiisss.. Ma… ma… mamma?… umm… aha! Mad! A,a,a,a… aagggi… Aagai… umm.. Ehh.. Again!"

"What does that mean?"

"I don't know but I have this funny feeling that we should publish iton a fanfiction siteon the internetunder Tv-shows/Buffy the vampire slayer"

"Yes, what a splendid idea! We should call us Geekylicious!"

"Yes! What a great idea!"

"And now readers I'll talk directly to you. Which country am IandHelgafrom? Here are some clues:

Ikea, Nobel and Ingrid Bergman

Guess now ore forever hold your peace.

Chp 5

It was still not a sunny afternoon in Sunnydale, especially not for Buffy since she was lying on the ground recovering after Spikes push.

"You pushed meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Buffy screamed while pointing at Spike.

"Hey I hurt you I really really hurt you hihihihi" Spike sang while jumping around Buffy.

Angel and Willow stood nearby and were discussing what they liked in fries.

"I especially like the crisp around the fries." Willow said while her eyes became dreamy and she drooled.

"Mmmmm doughnuts " Angel said while they both stood whit dreamy eyes and drooled.

"Oy did someone say crisp?" Spike asked.

"Mmmmm, crisps" Buffy mumbled while drooling.

"I have a crisp to you no but does anybody care? Nooooooooooooooooo I don't think soo, nobody cared about my headache and nobody cared about my chip." Spike said while sulking.

"Hey you said chip!" Buffy said heaving her self up.

"No I didn't!"

"Yes you did!"

"No I didn't!"

"Yes you did!"

"No I didn't!"

"Yes you did!"

"No I didn't!"

"Yes you did!"

"No I didn't!"

"Yes you did!"

"WE WANT FRIES, WE WANT FRIES, WE WANT FRIES!" Willow and Angelshouted in chorus.

A cell phone started ringing and playing a tune of 'It's raining men'. Everybody started digging in there pockets looking for there cell. Finally everybody got them up and answered at the same time and a voice was heard "God morning Angels"

"God morning Charlie" everyone said.

"I have a mission for you angels."

"What is it?" Buffy asked

"Don't be such nosy bitch let the man talk!" Spike said

"I'm not a nosy bitch!"

"Yes you are"

"No I'm not"

"Yes you are"

"No I'm not"

"Yes you are"

"No I'm not"

"HELLO, were was I, right, back the mission."

"Sorry Charlie" Spike and Buffy said in the same time.

A min past full with awkward silence until Angel said with his deep voice.

"Boss the missi-" he could hear a burp in the background. "Boss have you been drinking again?"

"Noooo (burp) I drank only water, it didn't look like water, It didn't taste like water but I'm (burp) certain it was wwwaaater."

"Boss hello! The mission." Willow said but there was no response.

"(cough)"

"Yes the mission, I… want.. Fries extra crispy and a coke and pizza mmmm piiizzza."

"Ok… we'll go right now…" Spike said.

"Yeeees. All right but but wait i want a kitten named Fluffy oohh Fluffy(sob) I miss you so much. (more sobbing)"

Klick.

"Let's go by fries" Willow said

AN hope you like It and sorry for the long wait but i hope it was worth it. Plus this chapter didn't answer any of the questions.. oh well, maybe next chapter do! plz r/r!


	6. The Xander

A/N sorry we have not written for a long time we have been busy with homework.So we thought we would write before we go on vacation. hope you like this chap of uh oh Willows mad again.

PS. in the last a/n we offended our home-country so all you from sweden:

we're truly truly sorry, and we salute you,

Oh Canada! oops, sorry, wrong national anthem,

the real is.. um... wait a minute... um... eh.. it's coming.. eh wtf, just go on and read the new chappie!

Chp 6

It was a cloudy afternoon in Sunnydale as the gang were walking to the burger place (sense they all could not fit in Angels red two-seated convertible.). But the weather was least of there concern sense their boss had given them a big mission, to go get fries. On the road Xander joined them as he was sent to buy fries for Giles (1 question answered, Giles DOES eat fries). It all was going smoothly until Xander said the forbidden sentence.

"Your skin looks soo smooth Angel, how do you do it?" Xander asked.

As Angel heared the remark his eyes lid up, finally after 200 years somebody wanted to listen!

"Well..."

"Oh for the love of God! I've been hearing about this shit for over a century and I'm blood-" Smack! Angel had slapped his hand over Spikes mouth.

"Don't mind him, let me tell you a little story about skin products history. It all began in a little village called Nice, you problably never heard of it, anyway there was this man who..." And Angels story had begun...

27.39 minutes and almost as many sighs later

Angels story had come to an ending and Xander was taking notes and paid very close attention and he hoped of all his heart that Angel wouldn't stop talking. As he thought the end was near Angel finished off his story by saying

"And that's how anti-wrinkle creme was invented..."

The others sighed in relief while Xander was sobbing, but little did they know, Angel had another story coming.

"And now let me tell you how i got into skin-products. It all began in a little village called London, you may not of heard of it but anyway when I was there I saw a vamp with baaaad skin and so i thought sense I'm gonna live forever my skin has to be perfect and I have to look the prittiest I can. Cause no one and I mean NO ONE want's a vamp with bad skin. What if a vamp has herpes and he bites you, you don't want it so it's my duty to look this good"

While Angel was talking, Xander was taking very important notes like:

Herpes BAD

Xander + Angel true love

Perfect skin Goooood + Angel

I love Angel

Perfection Angel

mmm.. Angel

As you might see, Xander is an obsessed stalker. This is only todays notes so here is an outtake from earlier notes:

02.06 AM: I finally got in through the bathroom window. I'm sitting in the closet, sniffing his clothes as I watch him rest on the bed. Damn! He's fine! Note to self: Snatch T-Shirt for night purposes, underpants for other purposes.

08.23 AM: Angel wakes up. He doesn't know that I'm in the closet. He's opening the door. He talkes to me. He says:

"What are you doing in my closet. No one's supposed to know that I'm here until I make my grand entrence."

He looks at me funny as I keep writing in my book that is pink with an angel on fluffy clouds. He still looks at me funny and expects me to talk. But how could I, when I'm paralyzed with loooove. He looks at me annoyed and slams the door in my face. I can hear him go into the bathroom. When I hear the shower running I sneak in.

08.37 AM: As I go to the bathroom I go straight to the hiding place that I've hid in several times. As i watch Angel he begins to soap his upperbody. With gentle smooth strokes he soaps his body. I see the foam reach his...

Hmmm before this turns in to a sleezy novel we stop but before we return to the story itself let's just say that xander sniffed the soap and let's just say that there is a picture not to be spoken of.

Now, back to the story

Angel started to explain how to apply anti-wrinkle creme on the T-zone

"And the T-zone is very important. I know the perfect way, see you start like this"Angel put a finger on his forehead and started to move it he felt a lump. What is this, he thought. He hadn't had a zit for such a long time he almost forgot what it was. But when he realised what it was, he felt all weak, but he mustered up the strenght to scream

"NOOOOOOO! WHY GOD, WHYYYYY! WHY MEEE! WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS CRUEL FATE!"

A/N Now you got to go in Alexander Harris brain and see his twisted mind. Hope you liked it! plz rr! cya dudes!


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